Don't Go Braking My Heart
by amythis
Summary: Before Tony and Angela can take the plunge, Tony puts on the brakes. (An alternate ending to "An Affair to Forget.")


Scene VI continued: Angela's Jaguar, parked by a lake at night

TONY: (as Angela softly kisses his neck and cheek) I'm ready to be uncorked, Angela! (He turns his head and they begin kissing passionately.) Angela, Angela, I feel…I feel the earth moving beneath us.

ANGELA: Tony, Tony, it's not the earth, it's us!

TONY: AAAHHHH, hit the brake! Hit the brake! AAAAHHHHH!

ANGELA: (overlapping) Tony! Get the brake! (He hits the brake just as the car is about to plunge into the lake.) Oh, that was close!

TONY: Yeah. Hang on, I'm gonna shift into reverse very carefully. (He does so and the car slowly backs up, to a couple feet above where they started.)

ANGELA: Maybe we'd be safer in the back seat.

TONY: Uh, yeah, maybe.

ANGELA: Tony, what's wrong?

TONY: Angela, when you used to imagine us, you know—

ANGELA: Throwing our friendship in the garbage?

TONY: Yeah, that. Didn't you picture something more romantic than sneaking around at home and in a hotel room? More romantic than, well, getting together in a car?

ANGELA: Wasn't that why you got me these sheepskin seat covers? To prevent sweat stains?

TONY: I didn't mean from this kind of heat.

ANGELA: You're the one who wanted us to keep our relationship a secret from the family.

TONY: I know. And don't get me wrong. I love this little black dress you're wearing and I want to take it off you—

ANGELA: Thank you.

TONY: But not here. Not like this.

ANGELA: Maybe we're not ready to take the plunge. So to speak.

TONY: Yeah.

ANGELA: But, Tony, we tried to arrange a romantic evening. With roast duck, candlelight, music, and everything. And that didn't work out.

TONY: I know. But, look, Angela. I think we'll have other opportunities. Sam lives in the dorms and she won't always be dropping by. And Mona has an active enough love life that she'll ignore ours some of the time.

ANGELA: And Jonathan can apparently attract girls even with a large pimple on his forehead.

TONY: (like a proud father) Yeah.

ANGELA: And he'll be away at college in a year.

TONY: You want to wait a whole year?

ANGELA: No, but we will have more opportunities then. And in the meantime, you're right. It'll happen in its own time and at its own pace.

TONY: Yeah. Let's just put the brakes on for tonight.

ANGELA: But we're not going into reverse?

TONY: No, that's not possible now that we, we said what we said.

ANGELA: Well, you said it out loud. I just said it on a watch.

TONY: Well, that's more official in a way.

ANGELA: Yes, and apparently everyone read it.

TONY: No, just Mona and Mrs. Rossini. Of course, Mona apparently told the kids.

ANGELA: I let Mother think you didn't confess to me.

TONY: Yeah, I misled Sam a little.

ANGELA: They're all going to wonder. Even if we sneak around.

TONY: Yeah. (He sighs.) We don't have to tell them what gear we're in. Physically I mean.

ANGELA: But we should tell them we're in love.

TONY: (smiling) Yeah. I like the sound of that.

ANGELA: (smiling back) Me, too. (They kiss, but this time it's more like their Inspiration Point kiss four years earlier, soft and sweet.)

TONY: First gear is nice.

ANGELA: Yes. Tony, I remember you told me a year ago that I need to explore the gears between first and fifth.

TONY: I meant in your public behavior, Angela. A little less dancing that shows off your legs, a little less singing about "fever."

ANGELA: So what gear would you like me to shift into in private?

TONY: Tonight? Let's go back to second. But keep your feet away from the brakes. (She grins and the scene fades on another kiss.)

Scene VII: The living room, about an hour later

(The room is in darkness but we can see that there's a couple sitting close together on the sofa, looking down at something in the male's lap. The front door opens quietly, but the couple doesn't notice.)

JONATHAN: You like it?  
GIRL: Yeah! It's much bigger than I pictured!

JONATHAN: Do you want to hold it?

ANGELA: (shocked) OH MY GOD!

TONY: (turning on the lights) What's going on in here?

JONATHAN: I was just showing her my puck. (We can see that he has a hockey puck in his lap.)

TONY: In the dark?

GIRL: Jonathan said it lights up.

JONATHAN: Sometimes the fluorescence doesn't work. I think we need to go someplace darker.

TONY: Not tonight, Jonathan.

GIRL: (standing up) It's getting late. I've got a curfew.

JONATHAN: (standing up, too) I'll walk you to your car.

TONY: Ten minutes, Jonathan.  
JONATHAN: Right, Tony. (He goes over and hands him the puck.)

GIRL: You call your dad "Tony"? That's so cutting edge! (They walk by Tony and Angela and out the door. Angela is still frozen in shock.)

TONY: Breathe, Angela, it's OK.

ANGELA: OK?! Tony, who knows what they were up to while we were gone!

TONY: You mean while we were at the hotel and in the car?

ANGELA: That's different. We're adults.

TONY: We haven't exactly been acting like it tonight.

ANGELA: (sighing) No, we haven't.

TONY: We probably should've just stood before the family and made an announcement.

MONA: (entering from the kitchen) What announcement?

SAM: (entering from the front door) Is it about how Jonathan has an enormous zit and apparently a new girlfriend? (Tony glances at Angela, who doesn't look like she's ready to confess or announce.)

TONY: Yeah, that's it exactly.

MONA: The zit or the girlfriend? Because the first one doesn't surprise me, since he's Angela's son, and the second one, well, being irresistible skips a generation in our family.

ANGELA: Not necessarily, Mother.

TONY: Yeah, Angela's plenty irresistible!

MONA: Oh? You've managed to resist her for seven years.

TONY: Not necessarily, Mona. (Sam and Mona stare at him, and then at Angela. Then Jonathan comes in, with lipstick all over his face.)

JONATHAN: Did you know that pretending to play ice hockey can get you tonsil hockey? (Sam looks disgusted. Angela looks shocked again. Tony looks like he's not sure whether he's proud. But Mona is unfazed.)  
MONA: It worked for me with Wayne Gretzky.

SAM: Speaking of tonsil hockey, Dad, were you and Angela about to tell us something?

TONY: Oh, right. I kissed Angela before midnight last night.

ANGELA: And several times since. (The kids and Mona stare at them.)

TONY: As a matter of fact, Angela and I are in love.

MONA: Oh my God!

SAM: Really?

T &amp; A: Yeah.

SAM: Oh, that's great!

JONATHAN: Yeah, it's about time!

MONA: And you're going public about this?

ANGELA: Well, yes.

TONY: It seems like the right time.

SAM: I bet the Hendersons were surprised.

M &amp; J: The Hendersons?! (Cut to commercial.)

Scene VIII: The kitchen, about half an hour later

(Jonathan has gone to bed and Sam's gone back to the dorms. Tony and Angela are cleaning up for the night, while Mona sits at the table and watches them.)

MONA: I should've known you two were a couple now. After all, if it looks like a duck, swims like a duck, and quacks like a duck, then it probably is a duck.

ANGELA: (sarcastically) Quack-quack. (She puts the long romantic candles in a drawer.)

TONY: (looking in the refrigerator) Speaking of ducks, what happened to the roast duck we left in the linen closet?

MONA: (with raised eyebrows) What were you two doing in the linen closet, with a duck?

TONY: Never mind!

ANGELA: Maybe Jonathan found it and fed it to his date to impress her.

TONY: (turning and looking at Mona suspiciously) Maybe. Or maybe somebody else came in while Jonathan and his date were out of the living room, decided to "borrow" some linen, found the duck, took it home, and fed it to her date.

ANGELA: You think Fred ate our duck?

MONA: Don't be too hard on Sam, Tony. She's still learning to be independent. (Tony looks over at Angela, who now gets it. They both look suspiciously at Mona. For once, she seems sheepish.) Quack-quack?

(The end credits roll.)


End file.
